tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8345462981115809499.post811114796634699702..comments2023-10-11T02:09:22.882-07:00Comments on Woman.Anonymous7: Loss from death vs. loss from betrayalwoman.anonymous7http://www.blogger.com/profile/09360902845606513227noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8345462981115809499.post-61450931637575746022007-10-05T21:38:00.000-07:002007-10-05T21:38:00.000-07:00I've heard it the other way round in relation to p...I've heard it the other way round in relation to people who lose their husband young "Death is a cruel mistress" I guess you can't put a face to death - or eek out revenge, which none of we lovely women would want to do anyway :)FI0NAhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17044942381358172235noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8345462981115809499.post-90268059955209797012007-10-05T13:16:00.000-07:002007-10-05T13:16:00.000-07:00I've done that thought experiment too from time to...I've done that thought experiment too from time to time -- wondered if it would have been better if he died. In the early days of recovery, I used to wish he had died, and I didn't have to work so hard on rebuilding our relationship. I think the worst would have been finding out about his addiction after he died, when there was no way for him to explain it.Mary P Jones (MPJ)https://www.blogger.com/profile/10251787926841410344noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8345462981115809499.post-12374104275203979052007-10-04T14:34:00.000-07:002007-10-04T14:34:00.000-07:00I wonder if it's a codependent thing to go to that...I wonder if it's a codependent thing to go to that place: OH MY GOD HE'S DEAD. I get there pretty quickly...partly because my husband's addiction is something that kills folks, but partly because I have some sort of belief that if I prepare for the worst, it won't hurt as much.<BR/><BR/>I'm in a similar place to you...my man is a pain in my ass...but today, I'm hanging in there with him. I want him, and I have hope that it can be better.joyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01453075718683708291noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8345462981115809499.post-76599314700334356352007-10-04T12:58:00.000-07:002007-10-04T12:58:00.000-07:00I wonder if it is a common feeling to have that it...I wonder if it is a common feeling to have that it would be easier to deal with a husband's death than with his betrayal or losing him to another woman? I think it may be.<BR/><BR/>A death, as devastating as that would be, would leave the spouse,(the wife in this hypothetical) with good feelings and memories of her husband, with feelings of closeness. On the other hand, betrayal and cheating destroy the closeness and so much more. <BR/><BR/>Personally, I wish my husband had died.Crystalhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16297525904374497184noreply@blogger.com