Almost noon and I still feel okay

I'm actually hungry, which is the first time since Friday. I was feeling angry about the realization I'd had this morning regarding the lifespand of the protitutes compared to that of our relationship, and sent husband a terse email expressing my feelings. I immediately sent another email explaining that I didn't want to be mean. I want to fully express myself, but I don't want to be mean, especially not via email. Maybe when we get into couples therapy, where any especially nasty feelings can be moderated by an uninvolved party. I feel fully justified for just about anything I do right now, given that I've had my reality completely snatched away. But I also want to remain focused on what I want to cause, and not to do things that undermine that outcome out of spite or anger. Maybe I'm a fool. But I have to believe in my own power, and this is how that belief manifests itself right now.